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The transcript of Squeeze the Day

Transcript[]

Act 1[]

Kitchen[]

(There's a note on the fridge. Mac walks up to it and reads it)

MAC: Dear Mac, we went to the beach. We'll be back by six. Don't let Bloo destroy the house, Frankie.

BLOO: They went to the beach? Without me?!

(Bloo runs out of the kitchen, and is about to leave the house in beach gear. Mac somehow gets to the front door before him and stops him)

MAC: Bloo, stop!

BLOO: Why would they go without me? I'd be tons of fun at the beach, splashing people, sticking sand down bathing suits, screaming "SHARK!"

MAC: Don't you realize the golden opportunity we've been given? For the next eight hours, we have the entire house to ourselves!

BLOO: I already watched TV.

MAC: You don't get it! Mr. Herriman and Frankie aren't here. That means no rules, no restrictions! We can do anything we want.

BLOO: Anything?

MAC: Anything.

(Beat.)

(Mac and Bloo start running wildy in the foyer with their arms out, screaming like maniacs. This whole montage has them screaming like maniacs. Cut to them spinning on the floor. Then, Mac is shown running in the hallways pots and pants, while Bloo comes up behind him covered in toilet paper and holding two plungers. Bloo's body engulfs the screen to black, and then the two are shown making funny faces as the lights flicker. It's shown that it's Mac turning the lights on and off repeatedly while Bloo makes poses. Mac turns on a stereo system and playing with a lamp like it's a guitar. Mac and Bloo go up a stairs and slide down it while playing with a cape. Bloo gives Mac a speaker and he starts making armpit farts all across the house, while Bloo makes farting sounds at a fan. Cut to Mac and Bloo riding on a vacuum cleaner across a big room. Cut to Mac inside a toilet, Bloo flushes it making Mac spin uncontrollably. Dizzy, they come up with another idea.)

MAC & BLOO: TOUCH HERRIMAN'S STUFF!

(The two run into Mr. Herriman's office and start touching his desk)

MAC & BLOO: PRANK CALLS!

(Mac grabs a telephone)

BLOO: GO GO GO!

MAC: THIS IS A JOKE! (laughs wildy)

BLOO: KICK-PUNCHING! (kicks Mac offscreen)

MAC: (out of breath) Bloo! Wait! We're waiting precious time by running around like idiots!

(Bloo talks so fast he's unintelligible)

MAC: Bloo! Listen! We may never, ever get an opportunity like this again! So we need to focus our energy, and do the most awesome of awesome things we can think of!

BLOO: The most awesome of awesome things?

MAC: Yes! Something so great, that we'll remember it for the rest of our lives!

Bloo: What the...? This isn't gold!

Mac: This is Uncle Pockets' bag of junk!

Bloo: Who?

Mac: The professional friend! The guy who buries stuff, remember?

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